Wednesday, June 09, 2010


Since I have been taking medication for my fibro, I have been having some strange, strange, strange, vivid, strange dreams.... did i mention strange?

last night I dreamt I was on a 12 story cruise ship, where I had my own personal bulter in my room, named Gabriel. He would come and go when I wasn't there, leaving me everything i needed. I remember a point where I got my books and headed down to the reading pool where every one could sit on the edge of the pool, with their feet in there and read. It was nice.

Then night before last, i was dreaming there was a crazy storm outside, that blew a bath tub up to my back porch, and then once the storm was over.. my back door was left open and Cupcake came walking back in, like he was brand new and ready to have another life here.

Its always something, very vivid, very bright, and very odd.. there have been many others but these are the most recent. I woke up thinking Cuppy was back in my house. It just seemed so real.

posted by ThreeOliveMartini @ Wednesday, June 09, 2010   4 martinis shaken not stirred

Wednesday, June 02, 2010

A Moment

there are times when a moment.. a comment.. a sigh.. can bring about a flash back .. a set back... a need to step back .. i hate it .. the people that are inadvertently involved in these situations inevitably believe it has something to do with them.. it doesn't.. not one bit..

its unfortunate.. they are innocent bystanders.. its enough to make me want to just remove myself socially from everything.. and there are times that i do .. another set back.. another scar that still hurts.. another moment from another life time effecting this new one.. i hate it.. i hate that i let that have say in this life.... there are days i feel i have made such leaps and bounds toward letting go of all that crap.. then in one tiny word.. one moment .. on incident.. i am back at square one.. not for long.. but long enough to shut down.. feel that self doubt.. feel all that i had thought i had left .. in the past .. a thousand miles away ..

i do my best every day not to let that get in the way of me moving forward.. i realise the things we have done.. we have experienced.. good and bad make us who we are right now.. i realise without those things i would be a different person.. i am not sure i would want it changed.. but what i am sure of is i don't like the way the past effects my present and those involved it in .. as hard as i try .. there seems to be no way to disconnect those things..

posted by ThreeOliveMartini @ Wednesday, June 02, 2010   0 martinis shaken not stirred


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Location: My Old Kentucky Home, KY - Kentucky, United States

still figuring out what I want to be when I grow up...speaking of that .. do I really have to ?

Today I Feel
My Punkymood

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  • Instant Gratification
  • Dreams....
  • A Moment
  • I Guess I Should Have Known..
  • again remiss but the need to let it out .. well it...
  • My Pupper....
  • Pain
  • So.. Umm.. Yeah
  • looking back
  • Spring Has Sprung
  • Cool Things


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