Monday, September 05, 2005

Dear Impatient Bitch

This is an open letter to the impatient bitch waiting for my parking space today as I was leaving the grocery store ( and for all you that are just like this )...

I am not at your beck and call .. I will unload my cart on my own time into my car..I will not hurry up and smash my produce .. I will not hurry because you are too lazy to drive past me to the space three spaces up from where I am .. I will not cut corners and just leave my cart in the parking lot.. you will wait while I take it to the return.. I will not throw my bag into the car and haphazardly start through the parking lot.. and If you honk, flip me off and curse me like you did today .. I will get out of my car and come over and ask you why ..

here is an example

Me: Why do you feel it necessry to try to hurry me along when there is a perfectly good space just up there ?

Impatient Bitch: Because you space is better and I dont want to walk that far

Me: Do you realize your honking and flipping me off isnt going to make me move any faster?

IB: I AM in a HURRY ..

Me: Do you realize in the time you sat on your lazy ass waiting for me you could have parked and been inside the store with about 10 things in your cart already ?

IB: *rolls eyes*

Me: Just for that.. I am gonna get in my car.. READ my mail.. touch up my lipstick.. call a few people on my cell .. I might be another 10 minutes.. I suggest you find another space..

IB:rolls window up and squeals tires.. then walks behind my car flips me off again on the way into the store

OK .. here is a bulletin for all you people that think just because I am walking to my car you can TRY to hurry me.. its NOT going to happen .. and if you are too fucking lazy to walk another 20 feet because that is how far the next available space is .. you deserve to wait as long as I take to do what I need to do .. I dont care of your car is bigger (most cars are ) .. I dont care if you have more money ( or think you do anyway ) ....I dont care how big a hurry you think you are in (start off sooner or plan your day better .. not my problem cause I am not in a hurry to get any where except maybe home to my yarn ) .... and here is the clencher.. if you are rude to me in any way .... I am going to take THAT much longer.. more flies with honey..

I know I am a bitch.. but had this woman been any kind of nice to me I might have tried a little harder to move a little faster ... if they had been old people.. I would have tried to get done as quick as i could.. but this was some rude ass bitch in a suburban thinking she owned the world because of who her husband is and how much money they have.. well guess what.... that is what you get for being RUDE ..

I am sorry this is a total peeve of mine.. parking lots in general usually bring out some sort of rage..people in general a rude and then laziness and audacity bring out more ..

I feel better now.. have a good night every one !!

posted by ThreeOliveMartini @ Monday, September 05, 2005  


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